The Panda Bear on Jury Duty and the Stress of The Unknown

Recently, the Panda Bear  was called to serve on the jury.   She went to the court house and sat in the jury room for about two and a half hours and then her and all the other potential jurors were dismissed.  All the cases were settled before they went to trial.    The court official assured the people who were called up for jury that the court was not wasting their time.   Just the threat and ability to go to trial scared people into settling their cases.

The Panda Bear is a big fan of the idea of just being there prevents a damaging action.   The Panda Bear thinks her cat has the best job of all; just her being there has scared the mice out of the Panda Bear's  apartment.   The Panda Bear felt she was acting like her cat in this respect in the court house.    Her simple presence had an effect(When the Panda Bear was at the courthouse there was a movie about jury service in Massachusetts.   The Panda Bear found out that women could not serve on the jury in Massachusetts until 1950 or nearly thirty years after women had the vote!   In many ways, the Panda Bear would think it is more important for women to serve on juries then vote but the Panda Bear believes women should have all the same political rights as men).

The Panda Bear is having an emotional crisis.    Some potential good news may be coming her way.   However, it is not definite.   She feels the uncertainty stresses out her out more then bad news does.   With bad news one can plan a course of action but with things being up in the air it immobilizes future actions.   The relief some people feel after a person dies is not purely because nothing more has to be done for the person who died.   The Panda Bear feels the when a person is dying his/her situation is unresolved; death is a sad resolution to an issue but it is a form of certainty none the less.

The Panda Bear often complains about her simple and routine life.   However, she does not deal well with the unknown.

The Panda Bear Blog on the Fall, Relaxation, and Organizations in Distress

While the Panda Bear likes the autumn, she went into a panic in mid-September.   She felt overwhelmed with things to do.    She had a bit of a cold so she took a day off to relax.   Then she went into a crisis mode of trying to narrow down the many things she would like to do in her four hours of scheduled down time.   What she probably did sleep.

Finally her high anxiety broke.   She thinks what finally broke it was doing some dreaded household chores.  It probably was the exercise that was involved in doing the dreaded chores that relaxed the Panda Bear and the Panda Bear felt she was actually accomplishing something (Actually, the writing of the Panda Bear Blog has helped the Panda Bear in doing some of these chores.   She now can think of her blog posting while doing the chores.   While now her fellow workers complain about the amount of non-paid employment time these chores take, Panda Bear takes it with sense of stoicism). 

The Panda Bear has also used some to reduce her stress some stress management techniques.   Exercise is a good multi-purpose activity that also reduces makes people feel good.   As a relaxation technique she likes is called autogenics which is not well known where you make statements imaging heaviness and warmth in various parts of the body and you keep stating to yourself "I am calm".  The Panda Bear also practices what she calls the cat meditation where the Panda Bear tries to meditate by focusing her attention on her purring cat that is sitting on her stomach.   The Panda Bear is also trying to cut down the amount of caffeine she drinks which she heard can increase anxiety (The Panda Bear is a coffee lover.   She now uses coffee with half the caffeine taken out).

The Panda Bear used to think that affirmations were stupid but now she does find that there is something to saying “I am calm” when she is upset.   The Panda Bear admits she has a gloomy streak.   She is jealous of some bloggers who obtained many viewers with their expressions of gratitude and happiness.  However when she is down now she repeats this which is a paraphrase of from the book of Ecclesiastics from the Bible.  It goes something like this:

Life is unfair.   The race is not always won by the fastest.  The unjust prosper.   It is foolish to think the world is going to work according to your logic.  However, what can you do about it?  Nothing- so just enjoy yourself.

The Panda Bear feels that this gets a certain realistic gloom about the state of the world out of her system.   

One thing that strikes the Panda Bear as illogical is how little organizations nowadays reward loyalty.  The Panda Bear thinks for institutions/governments/organized crime groups to survive they both have punish behavior they don't like but they also reward behavior they like.  

There were benefits to being a member of the Communist, Nazi, and Fascist parties.  In at least novels, organized crime just does not kill people-they offer riches to their members and to those who cooperate with them.    Being nice to people and doing them favors gives you some power over people that just being mean does not.

The Panda Bear is old enough to remember the old fashioned company.   It controlled its employees by being nice to them in the way the new organization that are now strictly business cannot.    Organizations can exert a lot of pressure on people by threatening to withhold some of its favors.  The Panda Bear feels if companies would have a lot better morale and be a lot more efficient if they did more for people then their stated policies.   They could withhold certain privileges if employees complained.   Nowadays the Panda Bear sees complaining and "disloyalty" (i.e. getting other jobs) as being rewarded.     She thinks this no rewarding of good behavior is going to catch up to organizations.

However, what does the Panda Bear know?   She is just a humble office worker who is glad she is not part of the corrupt plutocracy that seems to be in charge right now.

The Panda Bear on Her Return, Her Day Off and More Job Interviews

The Panda Bear is now back from her summer vacation.   So much has been going on in foreign affairs it is hard for the Panda Bear to stay informed.   However, she continues to say no to an imperial US and thinks the United States needs to focus on its problems at home.

The Panda Bear had an unusually productive last Tuesday.   She had a busy day at work, post a book review, voted in the local elections and watched a television show (The Panda Bear watches TV at most for about three hours a week).   She was in awe of her efficiency.   

Then she came down with a cold and was tired over the weekend.  This Tuesday she took the day off to do errands and she also had (ta-ta)-a job interview.   Furthermore, she was told both by the interviewer and a friend of hers who talked to the interviewer that the Panda Bear did well on the interview; the interviewer liked the Panda Bear's knowledge and personal style.

Of course, the Panda Bear has gone on many interviews recently and they have not led to anything.   However, the Panda Bear has been spending her day drafting her resignation letter- now her favorite piece of writing.

Dear Ms. Boss:

It is with mixed emotions that I am writing to tell you that I have accepted another position.   I am giving you my two weeks’ notice.   My last day of work will be on _____.  My new employer is very anxious to have me start as soon as possible.  I have given careful consideration to making this job change.

Regards,

Panda Bear

The position in question as well as some other positions the Panda Bear has for would be a pay cut.   The Panda Bear has been reading that salaries have been going down since 2008.     However, the Panda Bear is fortunate in that she can afford to take a pay cut.   She is glad she leads a frugal lifestyle.  The Panda Bear is not taken in with the false promises of happiness that the consumerist society makes.  , The Panda Bear feels it is time for a change and that she needs to learn new skills. (The Panda Bear thinks nowadays people too long in their positions are increased risk of layoffs)  She thinks some companies would offer her a more pleasant work environment.

However, in the unlikely event the Panda Bear gets a new job she will stop writing about her job in her blog.   Whenever, she goes on a job interview she promises herself try to be as happy as possible in her new job and have no expectations of advancement or promotion which has caused problems for her in previous jobs.  

She no longer needs promotion or advancement to feel smart and competent in her life; The Panda Bear has found her passion in the Panda Bear Blog.

The Panda Bear will Be Taking the Rest of the Summer Off. Publication to resume sometime in September

The Panda Bear Blog is about the importance of personal space in today's busy world.  Given that the blog is about the lack of rest and relaxation, the Panda Bear has decided to take the rest of the summer off from blogging.

She is exhausted.   Work has been busy.   Also surprisingly enough the Panda Bear has been getting a lot of job interviews.   Granted many of these jobs are at lower pay but the Panda Bear is getting hopeful that she may find a new position.   Though she is but a humble office worker, her skills seem to be in demand.

Even though getting job interviews is "good" it is making inroads in what little free time the Panda Bear has.  It is tiring and stressful.   It eats into the Panda Bear's "vacation" time as some of her time off is used for interviews.

The Panda Bear feels to enjoy her favorite summer activity of sitting outside and read.    She will return to blogging in the fall.